We are waiting
This month, Dividing By Zero takes a turn for the sexy.
I still had the untz untz booming around my skull and was cleaning up in time to the beat of the bass in my head. I recalled the timid touches and let myself indulge in a short fantasy. Anton Nabukov’s dying eyes came to life for a little while on the dance floor. I loved exerting that kind of power over a new target. Noticing my dopey smile, Paris ran over and wrapped her arms around me and cupped her hands over my breasts. And I let her. Because it felt fucking incredible.
It’s the simple things that’ll resurrect you.
“Someone’s in the good place,” she whispered in my ear, while running her hands down towards my crotch.
“Mmmhmm,” I purred right back.
A flash of cool breath and shivers ran down my spine. She knew all the right buttons to press. The secret triggers that turned me to jelly.
Give me sweet release. Give me oxygen and dry heat. Give me metal and concrete. Give me depression. Give me delirium and destruction.
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Just finished Chapter 1 of Survivor and I am overwhelmed by how much I love Chuck Palahniuk and aspire to write something that touches someone as much as his works touch me.
Run on sentences. Action.
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I watch the embers burn, trying to decipher their language. As if they’re speaking to me. As if there’s some ungodly truth behind each flaking bit of ash.
I hate the smell of cigarettes. I hate smoking.
But, still, I inhale bit of nicotine and carcinogens and traces of fatal poison, and I feel a rush of mild euphoria overcome me, a feeling that is both familiar and unknown.
Wind tears through my red American Apparel hoodie, stabbing the skin underneath. I try to ignore it as I exhale and examine the shapes my smoke and breath take. Then, I just watch the burn shifting my gaze between this warm cancer stick and the flood of city lights glowing below.
Something is coming. In a city like this one how can it not? In a world like this, every moment is full of possibilities. Maybe I’ve been trying to control the wrong situations. Maybe it’s time to let go. Come at me, universe.